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Sunday, June 29, 2014

Truth about symptoms Part 2...Fatigue

Updated...

The dreaded fatigue! I hate fatigue! Really, really H-A-T-E fatigue! Did I mention that I hate fatigue? You always see "fatigue" on a list of symptoms for Fibro, MS, Sarc, Lupus and pretty much any other illness out there. But no one really says what fatigue truly means. Hopefully, I can! I can usually push through all my symptoms except for this one. I can't fight this one.
No matter how hard I try, usually whips me. I have severe fatigue. Now, I am not talking about just getting tired and have to go lay down. No, this is knock down, go lay down before you hit the floor, feeling like you are getting the flu, blurry vision, hand tremors, cannot  speak correctly, like you just ran a 5 mile marathon but all you did was vacuum the living room, kicking your ass fatigue. Only way I can explain it! Lol

What I want people understand about my fatigue (and yours too) is:

  1. I wake up tired. I wake up fatigued. I wake up feeling like I have only had an hour of sleep when I just slept 8 hours.
  2. Everyday, I have to decide if it is really worth the energy to go to the store, vacuum, wash dishes, fold laundry or wash windows. I cannot do all of these in one day. Or hell, even in 2 days. I pick and choose, do partly, rest, do more, rest, finish the job, rest. Forget about dinner!
  3. Showering is truly a chore. The heat of the shower. The physical movement of washing. Shaving my legs...forget it lol. I have said in an earlier post, can't shower in the morning, zaps energy. Can't shower during the day, zaps my "good" energy. I can use that somewhere else. Try to shower mostly at night because I'm going to bed anyways but by that time I have used up all my energy throughout the day, tomorrow might be better for a shower. Maybe...
  4. When the fatigue hit's hard, it feels like I am getting the flu. Body aches, slight headache, muscle and bone aches. Just like the flu does. (This one took me a little bit to ignore. I seriously thought I was getting the flu lol)
  5. Riding in the car is very tiresome. I suppose it is because you are climbing into the car. Watching the road. Thinking about where you are going. This all causes me fatigue. I have to lay down. (No, I am not driving)
  6. Conversations. Seriously, conversing with someone fatigues me. I think it's because trying to process what the other person is saying and trying to process my own thoughts. Finding the correct words and hopefully saying them. A group of people to converse with just speeds up my fatigue. I tend to avoid groups.
  7. Lastly, this blog. Yes, this blog causes me fatigue. Even though 9 times out of 10 I am in my bed typing, it still causes fatigue. As I try to type, my fingers and hands tremor. My thoughts begin to run rampant at times. I forget how to spell simple words. I forget what I was just typing or where I was going with the topic. I read and re-read a paragraph multiple times and wondering "where in hell did that sentence come from?"  lol. Sometimes it takes me several days to type one post. But, as you can see, I keep trying.
Oh you spiteful fatigue, how I loathe thee! Some days you win but some days I win too! That is the battle that I face every day. And will keep fighting!!
Hugs!!
Jenn!
UPDATE: 



After talking with my mom, who has Myasthenia Gravis and Sarcoidosis, she reminded me that I forgot something...


8. When I (and my mom) get fatigued, let's say when I am at the grocery store, it feels like someone placed 50 pound weights on my legs and arms. My legs forget what their purpose is. I literally have to say "take a step damn it!". My arms are weighted and my fingers lose all fine motor skills. That frickin grocery cart seems like someone places boulders in it? Seriously, I can't push a grocery cart. Oh..going to pay is a challenge too. I cannot comprehend anything thing at this point. "Oh, I have to pay now? What? What do you need?" Whatever! Thank God for my husband and kids! (Side note: I cannot make it through the entire grocery store for all my groceries. I have to make several trips)


I'm sure I forgot something else too...what can I say...it's the fatigue!

Hugs!

Jenn

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