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My first trip to a dispensary. Guess what? It's not what you see on tv!
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Sunday, September 15, 2013

Increased anxiety and problems with decision making...

So today I had terrible anxiety and I noticed that I had a very difficult time making decisions. Long story short: neighbor, broken water line, flooding my yard and them digging holes in my yard without permission. UGH!

I noticed the following:
  1. Anxiety: my anxiety was so high I had tremors more than usual. My chest had pressure. My mind was racing. My face was red because my nerves were so bad.
  2. Decision Making: I could not make a decision. My hubby was at work and it was left to me. I looked at my other neighbor/wonderful friend for guidance on what to do about the situation but I could not decide for myself. I felt that I could not tell the idiot neighbor "No, you are not digging in my yard". That is not me. Before I got sick, I wouldn't hesitate to tell someone what I thought. This time, I needed my husband to make choices. This is what really bothers me because I was always this strong, opinionated woman who knew what to do all the time. I could think clearly and decide. Now, I can't decide. Ticks me off!
  3. Anger: I was so angry, I didn't' know what to do. I think this was heightened because of impaired decision making. It just frustrated me even more. I don't like confrontation. 
  4. Increased pain: Of course my pain increased. Especially in my hips and legs. From all the anger, anxiety and being ticked off because I couldn't make decisions my pain was increased. Bring on the ibuprofen!
  5. Mentally exhausted: I have difficulty thinking on a good day. This completely mentally exhausted me.
So what did I do to calm down... take ibuprofen, talked with my hubby, best friend and my wonderful neighbor next door. Took a deep breath, had a drink with the wonderful neighbor and thought....It is what it is and I can't change it. The yard will eventually be taken care of. I need to stop worrying about things I cannot change. It is only making me feel worse. I have to come to grips that I do have trouble making decisions and that is what I have hubby and good friends for. Love and support. More importantly...

You can't fix stupid! 

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